CANDACE STEVENS's (numbercruncherllc) Blog

A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally, he gets his suit.He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits until he finally buys fl...

A teacher told her young class to ask their parents for a family story with a moral at the end of it and to return the next day to tell their stories.In the classroom the next day, Joe gave his example first, “My dad is a farmer and we have chickens. One day we were taking lots of eggs to the mar...

Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and a baby stork. The baby stork is crying and crying and the father stork is trying to calm him. "Don't worry, son. Your mother will come back. She's only bringing people babies and making them happy."The next night, it's father's turn to do t...

I am sure you're saying, "Now, why in the world would I want to file a lien against my own child?  I trust him/her.  We are family."It isn't as crazy as it sounds.  I will explain the logic behind this to help you to understand why this is an important step to take when you loan money to your chi...

Anna Banana Kruchten CRS CRB, Phoenix Broker was the speaker on 1/26/21 for the AcriveRain's Weekly Zoom Meeting.  The topic was Developing Life and Business Plans.  The title itself gave me stress as I have listened to many presentations on this topic, and I always came away overwhelmed.  I woul...

An Irishman's been drinking at a pub all night. When he stands up to leave, he falls flat on his face. He tries to stand one more time, but to no avail. Again, he falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stand...

Five surgeons were talking about the best patients...The first surgeon says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything on the inside is numbered."The second surgeon says, "Nah - librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."The t...

Yes, Gifts can be a business expense.   To prove a gift is a business expense, your records must show the following:   1. Cost of the gift 2. Date of the gift 3. Description of the gift 4. Business purpose of the expense 5. Occupations or other information such as names, titles, or other designa...

A 92-year-old man went to the doctor to get a physical.  A few days later the doctor saw the man walking down the street with a beautiful young lady on his arm.  The doctor stopped him and said, "You sure are doing good aren't you?"  The man replied "I'm just following your orders.  You said to g...

A Pastor found a dead mule on the church grounds.  He called the health department.  They said they couldn't pick it up without authorization from the mayor.  The mayor was known to be rude and hard to get along with.  When the pastor called the mayor didn't disappoint.  He started ranting and ra...