maurice cohn's (vipermoe) Blog

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students: "The female dormitory is out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. The second time you will be fined $60. A third time will c...

> A retired man went into the Job Center in Downtown Denver, and > > saw a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested, he > > went in and asked the clerk for details. > > > > The clerk pulled up the file and read; "The job entails getting > > the ladies ready for the gynecologist...

A Redneck from Wisconsin went to the hospital where his wife was having a baby. Upon arriving, the nurse says "Congratulations, your wife has had quintuplets, five big baby boys." The Redneck says, "I'm not surprised, I have a manhood on me, like a chimney." The nurse replies, "You might want to ...

Never Argue with a Woman > One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside > cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. > > > Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. > > She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet ...

My wife told me to go to the doctors and get some of those tablets that 'help' get an erection. You should have seen her face when I came back and tossed her some diet pills! I'm still looking for a place to live.

My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell Andrea that, if she wanted to keep this from recurr...

Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch standard 4 pound dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the...

Advanced Biology Class Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term test. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk,' worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote: 1.) It is perfect formula...

A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?**** The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, 'About 2 hours.' The guy left.**** A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked,**** 'How long before I can get a hairc...

There comes a time when a woman just has to trust her > husband... for example... > > A wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her > bedroom. > From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two. She > reaches for a > baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard ...