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Ron and Alexandra Seigel, Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy (Napa Consultants)

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Rainer
12,727
Louise Dela Cruz
RE/MAX Gold Realty Sacramento - Sacramento, CA
SRES, SFR

I do think that we are becoming too sensitive. I love to be in the company of people who speak their mind and encourage me to speak mine. People who view disagreement as a spark for intellectual conversation and growth rather than as a spark for offense are the people I like to keep in my company. Of course respect for others needs to be maintained, and part of that respect is relaying our thoughts truthfully to others.

 

Great question topic!

Oct 11, 2015 11:24 AM
Ambassador
5,828,826
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Political correctness is highly overrated in my book.  I think we should be kind but this other stuff takes the "real" out of any conversation. We were talking about furniture with friends and one person said "I don't like anything Oriental." She then was mortified that she had offended me... and I wasn't.  The whole thing is silly. 

Oct 11, 2015 04:12 AM
Rainmaker
4,800,082
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

I don't know if I'm more easily offended or just tired of all the political attacks from both fringes.  Neither of these groups have any clue of how to be civil.

Oct 11, 2015 04:11 AM
Ambassador
1,452,819
Susan Emo
Sotheby's International Realty Canada - Brokerage - Kingston, ON
Kingston and the 1000 Islands Area

I do think the world has become far too PC.  To think that popular comedians will not work at colleges and universities now because their jokes just don't fly with the uber pc crowd -  that is sad.

I still believe in the old adage "Sticks and stones will break my bones
But words will never harm me."   I was always taught to consider the source and to have enough confidence in myself to never mind what anyone else had to say.  When did that change??

Oct 11, 2015 03:39 AM
Rainmaker
3,626,530
James Dray
Fathom Realty - Bentonville, AR

You bet all the time I watch what I say instead of saying what I would like to

Oct 11, 2015 03:35 AM
Rainmaker
212,755
Stefan Winter
Real Estate in IL & NV | Owner of Real Estate Web Tech | Daily Vlogger - Las Vegas, NV
Owner - Winter Group & Real Estate Web Tech

Yes, especially the younger generations now growing up. I blame the ridiculous things they get in trouble for at school now, it has gotten out of hand.

Oct 11, 2015 03:50 AM
Rainmaker
5,104,931
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Realtor

For sure... and we have lost our sense of humor along with the icreased sensitivity. I'm very tired of all this pc stuff!

Oct 11, 2015 05:07 PM
Rainmaker
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Lisa Von Domek
Lisa Von Domek Team - Dallas, TX
....Experience Isn't Expensive.... It's Priceless!

I think the media's agenda has been to make everyone think they are being offended...

Oct 11, 2015 02:31 PM
Rainmaker
921,504
Annette Lawrence , Palm Harbor, FL 727-420-4041
ReMax Realtec Group - Palm Harbor, FL
Making FLORIDA Real Estate EZ

Are we too easily offended?

If any of the following is true about the reader, you just might be too easily offended.

  1. You engage in listening to gossip. Gossip is ANY conversation about a person not in attendance that is not directly beneficial to that person.
  2. You engage in spreading gossip. Gossip is ANY conversation about a person not in attendance this is not directly beneficial to that person.
  3. When other are talking you are forming a response about YOUR experience. "It's all about me" people are easily offended.
  4. Do you listen to the speaker or only hear reason of offense.
  5. Do you not see the folks citing or teaching you about PC, themselves are the greatest violators.

Let's face it. We are in a seasons of following China's example of rewriting history. The WINNERS have always had this power. Who then defeated the American people? Who has been behind the curtain for over 30 years pressing a relentless attack on Christians and white, heterosexual males?

The winners are prevailing because everyone, everyone, everyone is afraid to fight. Hmm, sounds like the Afghanistan army.

Oct 11, 2015 07:55 AM
Ambassador
6,393,179
Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service / Woodland Real Estate, KW Diversified - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9671

Most people are not that sensitive, but the media plays up those who are so it seems worse than it is.

Oct 11, 2015 11:23 AM
Rainmaker
1,725,996
Sandy Padula & Norm Padula, JD, GRI
HomeSmart Realty West & Florida Realty Investments - , CA
Presence, Persistence & Perseverance

I have never been a PC individual, but I also abide by the 'Golden Rule'. This position seems to work for me.

Oct 11, 2015 10:09 AM
Rainmaker
856,038
Mark Don McInnes, Sandpoint-Idaho
Sandpoint Realty LLC - Sandpoint, ID
North Idaho Real Estate - 208-255.6227

YESSS.   I am often taken too serious, and of late seems that I see people reacting to something said, 180 degrees from its obvious intent.  I have no idea why.  I will say though, that the walking on egg shells is about over and I will be going back to my take it or leave it attitude...being respectful of  course.  Mark

Oct 11, 2015 06:31 AM
Rainmaker
2,781,173
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Being easy-peasy and speaking your peace when appropriate is the natural way. If one has something to do or say, let them go forth. How they say it is important. Pride, which protects the ego, is always looking for opportunity. I just do what I believe to be right in my heart and let truth & goodness prevail

Oct 11, 2015 03:35 AM
Rainmaker
725,121
Betty Knowles
Southwest Missouri Realty - Springfield, MO
Ready to sell? Call Betty!

Yes absolutely. There is no "right" not to be offended. 

Oct 11, 2015 11:27 PM
Rainer
19,007
Peter ReJune
United Realty Group - Palm Beach Gardens, FL
Trusted for Service, Respected for Results

Yes its because we have become a nation of cry baby, victims, fearful of our own shadows, who take offense to perceived slights (real or not), sadly this sentiment has been fueled for political gain to the detriment of  the masses. Its the new reality we live in and until we regain our self respect and get out individual confidence back it will remain because right now "everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die"

 

Oct 11, 2015 10:32 PM
Rainmaker
1,239,901
Sam Shueh
(408) 425-1601 - San Jose, CA
mba, cdpe, reopro, pe

Alexandra,

I like to be treated as I treat others.   Every once in a while there are clients step on your toe.  I do not recall they have complained about my style or personality affecting a relationship.....

Oct 11, 2015 01:22 PM
Rainer
187,002
Raj Taj
RE/MAX - Lake Bluff, IL
Drive By Blessings!

Nowadays some get a instant death penalty by offending. I try to say things as amicable as one could.

Oct 11, 2015 12:14 PM
Rainmaker
634,482
Kathleen Luiten
Resort and Second-Home Specialist - Princeville, HI
Kauai Luxury Ocean Home Sales

I think there are genuinely offensive comments and then there are people who look for anything that can be interpreted as possibly offensive, even when the intent is clearly not to offend.

Yes, many people are much too easily offended. I refuse to walk on eggshells. If someone is too narrow to receive my true intent I let them have their mistaken offense.

Oct 11, 2015 09:04 AM
Rainmaker
2,310,576
Belinda Spillman
Aspen Lane Real Estate Colorful Colorado - Aurora, CO
Colorado Living!

I think it is hard to generalize.  I don't take things people say about me too seriously.  What matters most is what I think of myself.  If someone chooses to lash out at me, they obviously have some issues that I am not aware of.  

Oct 11, 2015 08:07 AM
Rainmaker
1,771,867
Noah Seidenberg
Coldwell Banker - Evanston, IL
Chicagoland and Suburbs (800) 858-7917

On the Internet yes Ron & Alexandra and I agree with many of these answers. 

Oct 11, 2015 07:56 AM
Rainmaker
5,583,278
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Happily Retired - Franklin, MA
Previously Affiliated with The Todaro Team

yes, we are over the top with political correctness.....

Oct 11, 2015 07:16 AM
Rainmaker
3,071,489
Tony and Suzanne Marriott, Associate Brokers
Serving the Greater Phoenix and Scottsdale Metropolitan Area - Scottsdale, AZ
Haven Express @ Keller Williams Arizona Realty

Ron and Alexandra Seigel In the US (as opposed to the UK) - absolutely yes.  And - no eggshells for me.  Don't know if it's due to the Monty Python upbringing but I get a kick out of "the Donald" telling these PC reporters to go "pound sand"!

Oct 13, 2015 03:41 AM
Rainmaker
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Debbie Reynolds, C21 Platinum Properties
Platinum Properties- (931)771-9070 - Clarksville, TN
The Dedicated Clarksville TN Realtor-(931)320-6730

Very touchy indeed. It seems you can't speak your mind on any subject without someone rearing their head and saying you hurt my feelings or you are a bigot, prejudice or unfair.

Oct 12, 2015 12:50 PM
Rainmaker
699,277
Chris and Dick Dovorany
Homes for Sale in Naples, Bonita Springs and Estero, Florida - Naples, FL
Broker/Associate at Premiere Plus Realty

Yes, it's not fun to be PC.

Oct 12, 2015 12:29 PM
Rainmaker
115,432
Jeanne Feenick
NextHome Premier - Basking Ridge, NJ
The Agent you choose REALLY does make a difference

I think political correctness has become so over the top that we all walk around on egg shells.   A real shame really.  

Oct 12, 2015 08:21 AM
Rainer
39,897
Pam Maglione
Pam's VAS - Levittown, PA

YES!!!

Oct 12, 2015 06:06 AM
Rainmaker
2,390,620
Bob "RealMan" Timm
Ward County Notary Services - Minot, ND
Owner of Ward Co Notary Services retired RE Broker

I think most people are much easily-er offended because it has become "Chic" to be offended. It's like everyone wants to be in a niche or group. Being a "victim" has become all the rage. To bad, I enjoy being a Realman and a Christian who can take it and forgive it.

Oct 12, 2015 04:22 AM
Rainmaker
386,342
Bruce Brockmeier
Internet Marketing Consultant to REALTORS® - Yorba Linda, CA
Coached By Crouch

No question about it.  Some people are too easily offended.  The media is part of the problem.  They seem to look for these "offended" people and then give them free publicity.  I guess it brings them ratings.

P.S.  Reading through this whole thread, I have to agree with President Bush about broccoli! 

Oct 12, 2015 01:46 AM
Rainmaker
1,027,602
Susan Haughton
Long and Foster REALTORS (703) 470-4545 - Alexandria, VA
Susan & Mindy Team...Honesty. Integrity. Results.

Yes, people have become much too sensitive and are easily offended.  No, I do not monitor what I say or think as to not offend.  I do not go out of my way to be insulting and have always prided myself on my innate tact, but beyond that, no.  

Oct 12, 2015 01:25 AM
Rainer
28,413
Blanca Barajas
Winter Group - Las Vegas, NV

Yes, I have a bold personality and at times I don't speak because I think it might offend or hurt someone. 

Oct 12, 2015 01:09 AM
Rainmaker
1,209,215
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

I still say it as I see it.  I never go out of my way to be offensive or rude, but I'm not walking on anybody's eggshells.  

The fact that everybody wants to "nerf the world" has softened all of us and made us all so ridiculously sensitive that it drives me nuts.  

Oct 12, 2015 12:33 AM
Rainmaker
1,712,676
Joe Pryor
The Virtual Real Estate Team - Oklahoma City, OK
REALTOR® - Oklahoma Investment Properties

We all need a filter before we speak, and we should use empathy to guide our response. I don't have a problem speaking my mind but I realize that for reality testing my truth extens to the tip of my nose and goes no further it it does not create emotional resonance in the person I am speaking to.

Oct 12, 2015 12:17 AM
Rainmaker
1,064,623
Kimo Stowell
HI Pro Realty LLC RB-21531 - Honolulu, HI
REALTOR Associate® RS-76763 - Honolulu Hawai'i

Aloha RnA,

This is a post about manners, if you truly do not want to offend someone, follow established etiquette and protocol. Those who think manners are merely superfluous remnants of the Victorian era are the self centered jerks of this one.

Taking offense to what others have to say is a choice. What I like to remind myself is not to take what others say too personally. What you think of me is really none of my business and vice versa. However, if your going to stand up on a soap box and pontificate don't be surprised if you get a bit of rotten fruit in your face, after all you are inviting it.

a hui hou, 

 

Oct 14, 2015 07:16 AM
Rainmaker
364,623
Joshua Frederick
Home Inspector for ASPEC Residential Services, LLC - Defiance, OH
Home Inspector in Defiance & all of Northwest Ohio

Yes!  I think your question applies to Agents and Inspectors nowadays as there are Home Inspector's out there that are trained not to "elevate or heighten moods in a negative way" to anyone involved in the Real Estate transaction as its bad for business and subsequent referrals from Agents.

Since most of you are Real Estate Agents, how do you think Inspectors should talk, write, or convey their findings? 

Oct 12, 2015 09:42 PM
Rainmaker
420,985
Christopher Pagli
William Raveis Legends Realty Group - Tarrytown, NY
"I Stay Open Until You Close"

i think it really depends who you are dealing with.  some are more open then others and some take life more seriously then others.  If you break it down to the different personality types, I think some are definitely more easily offended.  I have no problem saying what I mean and meaning what I say.  Being rude or inappropriate is one thing but others sensitivity level is not my problem, it's theirs.

Oct 11, 2015 09:24 PM
Rainmaker
323,664
Fred Cope
Reliant Realty in Nashville, TN - Nashville, TN
Looking For Homes With A Smile

Hello Ron and Alexandra.  You proffer an interesting question, and the answers will vary, but there will be a common thread through many along the lines of being careful what we say; and another will form around the idea that some folks are never satisfied.  I am NOT easily offenedI try to be accomodating without being wishy-washy, but I will not compromise my values in order to appear something I am not.  Example: I have originated loans where  parents owed back child support, and a judge ordered a catch-up plan that was being followed in good faith.  I had no problem working the loan; but on a few occasions I worked with spouses who attempted to hide their obligation and wanted me to look the other way.  No! I figure "a man who does not take care of his family is worse than an infidel", and I care more for children than getting a deal.  What always struck me strange is  the man who abandons his responsibility to children of his own blood, moves in with another woman and takes on the role of provider in that household.  Simple Rule: "Right is Right.  Wrong is Wrong.  And you never have the right to do wrong."

Oct 11, 2015 12:55 PM
Rainmaker
969,888
Frank Rubi
Frank Rubi Real Estate, LLC - Metairie, LA
FrankRubiRealEstate.com

Yes, to much PC going on. Before you know it saying "I'm going fishing" will be offensive. 

Oct 11, 2015 12:41 PM
Rainmaker
1,683,912
Larry Johnston
Broker, Friends & Neighbors Real Estate and Elkhart County Subdivisions, LLC - Elkhart, IN
Broker,Friends & Neighbors Real Estate, Elkhart,IN

There are always situations where we have to walk on eggshells once in a while.

Oct 11, 2015 09:41 AM
Rainmaker
864,658
Les & Sarah Oswald
Realty One Group - Eastvale, CA
Broker, Realtor and Investor

I do think twice before I react or speak my mind. I know that compassion and sensitivity are some of the ingredients that are lacking in our daily conversations. We all need to lead the future generation by example.

Oct 11, 2015 08:51 AM
Rainmaker
4,272,548
Paul S. Henderson, REALTOR®, CRS
Fathom Realty Washington LLC - Tacoma, WA
South Puget Sound Washington Agent/Broker!

I find it amusing that the people, I see, who are the most venomous have the thinnest skins.

Oct 31, 2016 03:57 PM
Rainmaker
533,993
Robert Havana
Park and Protect- Alberta Real Estate License Parking - Calgary, AB
Alberta Real Estate License Parking

i believe everyone is overly cautious and that people are also overly sensative.

May 03, 2016 04:47 PM
Rainmaker
5,772,575
Ron and Alexandra Seigel
Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA
Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy

Thank you all taking the time to answer this question.  We appreciate it, and wish each and everyone of you continued success.  A

Nov 05, 2015 08:04 AM
Rainer
3,592
Timothy Becker
Real Estate - Fountain, CO
GRI-Sell Homes in the Fountain/ Ft Carson Area

Just walking on some proverbial eggshells reading this column (you should read Greg Nino's blog and see some real eggshells. Have a great day

Nov 04, 2015 05:15 PM
Rainmaker
1,084,061
Ginger Harper
Coldwell Banker Sea Coast Advantage~ Ginger Harper Real Estate Team - Southport, NC
Your Southport~Oak Island Agent~Brunswick County!

Yes I do...I try not to work with those that make me feel that uncomfortable..

 

Oct 17, 2015 11:43 AM
Rainmaker
510,046
Michele Connors
The Overton Group, LLC Pitt & Carteret County - Greenville, NC
Your Eastern North Carolina Realtor

totally .... just read a "black and white ' blog..it was good but we have to dance around things instead of have a healthy discussion. 

Oct 16, 2015 09:49 AM
Rainmaker
1,543,662
Thomas J. Nelson, REALTOR ® e-Pro CRS RCS-D Vets
Big Block Realty 858.232.8722 - La Jolla, CA
CEO of Vision Drive Realty - Coastal San Diego

You find what you seek, when you seek negatives-there you go. I not only think they are more easily offended, they seek to be. People seem to look for ways to be offended today rather than focus on what's important. CA freeways are loaded with them.

Before I had "anything to lose" in my ignorant youth, I I got in lots of trouble "policing the world". Now, as a Dad, Husband, Business owner & Leader. I have to knock'em out with higher ground emotional intelligence...it's tough to set the right example...you have to swallow ego sometimes; that's why so few do. Still a student, still growing-BTW.

Oct 16, 2015 02:19 AM
Rainmaker
516,437
Brenda J. Andrew
ULTIMA REAL ESTATE - Willis, TX
Professional Realtor in Conroe/Willis, TX

Absolutely.  I believe as a Christian though we need to speak the truth in love.  Hopefully if we do that well, then it will not offend.  Great question!

Oct 14, 2015 10:33 PM
Rainmaker
1,577,943
Karen Fiddler, Broker/Owner
Karen Parsons-Fiddler, Broker 949-510-2395 - Mission Viejo, CA
Orange County & Lake Arrowhead, CA (949)510-2395

Oh my goodness yes, YES! It's ridiculous that we can't find humor in our differences any longer. We're too serious and frankly self-absorbed. Not everything is about us. 

Oct 14, 2015 11:55 AM
Rainmaker
966,859
Shanna Day Team Leader AZ & UT - Call 480-415-7616
Keller Williams Realty EV (AZ) & Keller Williams SLC (UT) - Mesa, AZ
Top 0.33 of 1% of 79,000 AZ Realtors

oh goodness yes!   Even with my own family.  What ever happened with "the Golden Rule" principle?

Oct 14, 2015 05:44 AM
Rainmaker
763,883
Tony Lewis
Summit Real Estate Group - Valencia, CA
Summit Real Estate Group Valencia & Aliso Viejo

Yes, but as Realtors we are good at figuring out the type of conversation to have with our new clients in a rather short amount of time.

Oct 13, 2015 08:05 AM
Rainer
428,933
Chris Lima
Turtle Reef Realty - Port St Lucie, FL
Local or Global-Allow me to open doors for you.

Yes, it seems that if you come across a person that isn't offended it's rare.  I don't believe that all the political correctness is helpful and actually I believe it continues to cause more rifts.

Oct 13, 2015 05:40 AM
Rainmaker
32,051
Amelia Robinette
NoVa House and Home - Frankly Realty - Falls Church, VA
Education, Innovation, Service

I can see why a perception of overly PC can get frustrating, but why not respect a group or person who says "that's offensive, please stop"? And then stop. I see the proliferation of such a high level of respect for our fellow society members as a positive.

Oct 13, 2015 12:59 AM
Rainmaker
2,362,948
Lise Howe
Keller Williams Capital Properties - Washington, DC
Assoc. Broker in DC, MD, VA and attorney in DC

YES!!! and a double yes! 

Oct 12, 2015 12:11 PM
Rainmaker
4,572,117
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Pasadena And Southern California 818.516.4393

Uh-oh, what did I say now?

Oct 12, 2015 03:59 AM
Rainer
482,547
Bruce Kunz
C21 Solid Gold Realty, Brick, NJ, 732-920-2100 - Howell, NJ
REALTOR®, Brick & Howell NJ Homes for Sale

Ron and Alexandra Seigel , I don't know if people in general are really 'offended', or they seem to be because are told they should be. In reaction to that, I am usually 'careful' what I say and how I say it, but still say what needs to be said. Works sometimes better than others.

I've generally found that those who preach "tolerance" of their "beliefs" are proportionally intolerant of others. Especially when they have is a reactive audience for their feel-good moment...
Bruce

 

Oct 12, 2015 03:14 AM
Rainer
183,407
Judith Sinnard
SMARTePLANS; Houston, Texas - Houston, TX
The SMARTePLAN Lady

I don't think people are more sensitive, I think we've been culturally conditioned to "react" and in retrospect I think that is sad. The generations behind mine have lost the means to "dialog meaningfully" --- which is a give-and-take learning process of exchanging and assimilating information that may or may not include differing views. Nope. . now they are taught to self-edit with each "takling head" regugitating what they heard online .. then the other person does the same ... and the "conversation ends".  Sad ... very sad.

Oct 11, 2015 10:30 PM
Rainmaker
282,018
Nancy Robinson Ranked #6 in MI
Century 21 Town and Country - Royal Oak, MI
#11 Century21 Realtor in the US, #16 in the World

I think way too many people grew up listening to BIG BIRD tell them they were special just because,,,,,. And some of  that big bird generation feels showing up intitles them to what ever the heck benefits their ingrained belief that they are special just because.

Sorry BIG BIRD I'm calling you out on this!!! 

Oct 11, 2015 01:08 PM